User blog:Winter Moon/Bulls*it:A 13-year old's school days:Chapter 7: Catch me if you can
I really had no idea what would happen when I woke up that morning, and seeing how crappily I had slept, I had no idea how good it would turn out. Because in all senses of the word, I woke up in a completely sucky way. So enough with the third person view.Here's what happened: I woke up with a sweat sock in my mouth. I'm not saying that to say my tongue was dry, or I had a sore throat, or anything like that. It was just a filthy, dirty, crappy sweat sock, and I woke up with it in my mouth like a pacifier. I bolted up in bed and started spitting like crazy. Then I wondered how the hell a sock had gotten into my mouth. As if in answer, I saw the greasy kid, Peanut, the one I had beaten up, leaning against the wall, doing the worst job ever concealing cracking up. I whipped out of bed and lunged at him, but he was already slipping out the door. Not that he could do anything other than slip, I guess, what with all the grease in his hair and all. I raced after him, feeling glad I had not undressed before falling asleep. Going after some asshole prankster in my underwear would top my list of stupid ideas (or come very close) When I burst through the doors of the dorm, Peanut was running for all he could, with a fat greaser, a black greaser, and a small greaser. I had always been a good runner, so I figured I could catch them. Until, that is, we made it to the gates. There were a bunch of bikes there, and they each hopped on one. This led me to believe this had been a planned hit. All of them rode off about as fast as me sprinting to the best of my ability... times three. I thought I would never catch them... until the fat greaser got his back wheel stuck in a crack. Knowing it was my only chance, I ran up, grabbed him, and dumped him onto the pavement. He dropped a small plastic slingshot, which I scooped up. It could come in handy. I jumped on his bike, gave an almighty shove to dislodge it from the crack, and rode at full speed after the greasers. I could ride about as fast as them, and I had to, even to keep up with them. They started off towards the main Bullworth town, and then to the New Coventry area. I had looked up Bullworth on Google Earth, and New Coventry I remembered as crappy with a capital "C".I thought as we rode through that I would either crash into a dumpster or run over a hobo. I managed to avoid both, and continued the chase. Eventually, after a few minutes, we came to a dirt trail, which they all rode down. In the distance, I could see a junkyard. I heard Peanut yell "Why don't 'cha give up, huh?" "Not until I shove the sweat sock up your ass, jerkwad!" I yelled back. We came to a big ramp, the kind which I had rarely had the guts to go off before, and we had to bunny hop over it. Unfortunately, the front wheel of my bike whacked the fence, which caused me to face plant into a pile of garbage. "Son of a cupcake!!!" I muttered as I stood and wiped a banana peel off my face. Something was also poking me in the ribs:it was the slingshot I had picked up earlier, and pretty much forgotten about. I pulled it out:might come in handy.I looked around the junkyard:No greaser in sight, a maze of trash. It seemed like something out of Fellini. I heard a tire behind me, and I spun around: the little greaser was riding right at me. Grabbing a pebble from the ground, I drew back the rubber band, and fired. Missed. The greaser was about thirty feet from me, so I had little room for more screw-ups. I picked up another small rock, and fired. Missed again. The greaser was less then twenty feet, and I was up against a crane of some sort. I had one more chance. I picked up the last rock I could find, aimed carefully, and fired.Bulls-eye! I popped the greaser right in the head, and he fell off the bike like a brick. I took a few seconds to look him over:he was fine, but he'd be out for an hour or two. Then a few more to see how I was: A few small cuts and scrapes, and one big cut on my arm. I'd have to treat it once I got back to school. If I get back to school in one piece, I thought. I heard an odd whooshing sound that cut my thoughts off. It probably would've cut my head off if I hadn't ducked. It was a huge-ass sledgehammer, and the black greaser was swinging it like it was a feather. I considered briefly just running away. Briefly. I had not been known for a cowardly personality at my old school, and wasn't going to build one now. I ducked another blow, and, remembering martial arts, spun on my left foot, and executed a perfect back kick, tagging him right in the solar plexus. For how big he was, he toppled on contact with my foot like a cardboard cutout. He wasn't out, but he would have a hard time running for a bit. Planting my foot on his chest, I said, as coolly as I could "Now where's Peanut? If you tell me, I'll only knock out two of his teeth." "..." "Hey, man. Time's-a-wasting. And I'll be a wasting as well." He looked up, smiled, and said "No, you'll be a-wasted." "What the f-" It felt like a cherry bomb went off against my head. Cradling my head, I looked behind me: Peanut was holding a tire iron, and he looked pissed. "So, hero, you couldn't run, could 'ya? Too bad for you." I sighed. "Sorry, Peanut, this violates all my pride as a guy, but you had it coming." And with that, I kicked him square in the crotch. His face turned mauve, and he tipped over as neatly as anyone who had just been hit in the crotch could. Sheer poetic justice. "Now how's that for vengeance, huh? Try thinking before you mess with Snowball, huh?" I said triumphantly."See you guys around." Peanut made a sound like a piccolo. Then said, in a voice like Minnie Mouse, said "We ain't gonna forgive this, you piece a' crap. We're gonna skin you alive." "At least Bullworth ain't gonna be boring, then, huh? Now, if you'll excuse me, it's been real, it's been fun, but I can't say it's been real fun. I gotta get to-" And then, faintly, in the distance, a bell rang. "-class." Category:Blog posts